A Foolish Government

In these tough economic times, it’s great to hear some good news! Did you know that Taco Bell is buying the famous Liberty Bell? It’s all part of an effort, the company says, to “help the national debt,” by purchasing and maintaining national landmarks privately, instead of depending on the American taxpayer to protect these treasures.

Taco Bell believes this will start a trend of charitable purchases of landmarks and historical items by other US companies. The Liberty Bell will be renamed the Taco Liberty Bell, but will still be viewable by the public, the company says in their press release, which ran in multiple newspapers across the nation.

The White House weighed in on this story, with press secretary Mike McCurry indicating that the administration approved of the deal and that they were in talks to sell the Lincoln Memorial to Ford. America’s oldest car company hopes to rename the memorial The Lincoln Mercury Memorial, in honor of their car model.

“We’re hoping to do a series of these,” said McCurry, regarding the White House’s attitude towards the privatization trend. With this practice already common at sports stadiums, museums, and other venues, our national landmarks are just one more sign of corporate sponsorship in everyday life.

Worried about the White House being renamed by a corporation? (The White Castle Burger House, perhaps?) Thousands were similarly afraid when this notorious April Fools’ hoax happened in 1996. Yes, my friends, if you believed what I just wrote, you fell victim to a famous fake! Taco Bell designed this advertising campaign as an April Fools’ Day joke, and the White House played along. Talk about a foolish administration!

The Lincoln Memorial is safe and so is the Liberty Bell, which remains in Philadelphia under the supervision of the National Parks Service. But, I thought I’d give you fair warning. With April Fools’ Day right around the corner, you may be in danger. Best reflect on these quotes now:

  • April 1- This is the day upon which we are reminded of what we are on the other three hundred and sixty-four. ~Mark Twain
  • You can fool all the people some of the time, and some of the people all the time, but you cannot fool all the people all the time. ~Abraham Lincoln
  • Fool me once, shame on you; fool me twice, shame on me. ~Chinese Proverb
  • I have great faith in fools- self-confidence, my friends call it. ~Edgar Allan Poe
  • A common mistake that people make when trying to design something completely foolproof is to underestimate the ingenuity of complete fools. ~Douglas Adams

This weekend, remember that only fools rush in,

~Bob

P.S. Have you ever played a great April Fools’ prank or have you fallen victim to a doozy? Share it on our Facebook page, and you’ll be automatically entered to win a prize from the team at Matchmaker Logistics. Really. No joke.