A Nun Walks Into a 7-11

Matchmaker 711 Storefront HeaderDid you know what today is?  Yes, it’s July 11, or 7/11, otherwise known as 7-Eleven Day.  According to the 7-Eleven corporate website, approximately 25 percent of the U.S. population lives within one mile of a 7-Eleven store.  It is the largest chain of convenience stores in the world with close to 53,000 stores in 16 countries.  And, in homage to last week’s Thought for the Weekend, I’d be remiss if I didn’t tell you that 7-Eleven has the largest ATM network of any retailer in United States.

Born in 1927, when an employee of Southland Ice Company in Dallas, Texas started selling milk, eggs and bread from the ice dock, the convenience store eventually became known as 7-Eleven to reflect the hours of operation.  Later, it was the first convenience store to operate 24-7, the first to sell-fresh brewed coffee in to-go cups (now selling a million cups per day), and the first to offer a self-serve soda fountain with super-size drinks like the 32-ounce Big Gulp®. 

Matchamker Logistics 7-11As for its famous Slurpee® beverage, the company sells almost 13 million Slurpee® beverages each month. Since introduced in 1966, close to 6.5 billion Slurpee drinks have been sold, almost enough for every person on the planet.  Now there’s a fact to make you shudder!
    
Christmas Day is one of the biggest sales days of the year for the 7-Eleven, but July 11th isn’t far behind!  Celebrated as the company’s official birth date, most Americans know it simply as Free Slurpee Day.  In what’s become an annual event, 7-Eleven stores host a national giveaway of one free 12-ounce Slurpee per customer. (The chain used to give away a 7.11-ounce Slurpee, but parents wanted cups with lids so there would be less mess in the car, prompting the company to switch to its small 12-ounce size.)
  
Like it or loathe it, there’s no denying that the convenience store has become a part of the fabric of American pop culture, in large parts thanks to “The Simpsons” fictional Kwik-E-Mart which parodies the chain’s un-nutritious, exorbitantly priced goods.  And, if the company’s corporate website is to be believed, it seems that everyone has bought something there at one time:

Two nuns were shopping at a 7-11 store. As they passed by the beer cooler, one nun said to the other, “Wouldn’t a nice cool beer or two taste wonderful on a hot summer evening”?

The second nun answered, “Indeed it would, Sister, but I would not feel comfortable buying beer, since I am certain it would cause a scene at the cash register”.

“I can handle that without a problem”, the first nun replied, and she picked up a six-pack and headed for the check-out. The cashier had a surprised look on his face when the two nuns arrived with a six-pack of beer.

“We use beer for washing our hair” the first nun said, “back at The Abbey, we call it Catholic Shampoo”.  Without blinking an eye, the cashier reached under the counter, pulled out a package of pretzel sticks, and placed them in the bag with the beer.

He then looked the nun straight in the eye, smiled, and said, “The curlers are on the house”. 

Double gulp the good life this weekend,

~Bob