It’s that time of year again! Matchmaker is abuzz as Pam Pickral (Sr. Sales Carrier Rep) and I get ready to head to Tennessee for the annual NASTC conference. Last year, our Star Wars-themed booth was out of this world! This time, it’s the Year of the Superhero and I can’t wait to unveil all of the fun surprises we have in store at the Matchmaker Logistics booth!
Last year, I published a Just Another Mary Monday entitled “Redneck Jedis”, which proved to be one of the most popular emails I’ve ever sent. So, in keeping with tradition, I decided to look into Redneck Superheroes. Great minds think alike, because I soon stumbled upon a blog by Jacob Russell who took inspiration from Jeff Foxworthy and the Redneck Jedis to create his own list of Redneck Superhero traits (see below).
But, Jacob isn’t the only one celebrating redneck superpowers. Did you know that Atlanta hosts the Summer Redneck Games? A charity fundraiser inspired by the Olympics, once the ceremonial grill is lit, the games begin with competitions like: the Hubcap Hurl and Redneck Horseshoes – in which toilet seats take the place of regular horseshoes.
But don’t be fooled into thinking that rednecks only live in the Southern United States. There are redneck superheroes-in-training the world over. For example, in Finland, each July, there is the Wife-Carrying World Championships. The husband who can sling his wife over his shoulders and carry her the fastest across an obstacle course wins a coveted prize: his wife’s weight in beer.
Without further ado, here is a worldwide reference guide to spotting redneck superheroes:
You Might Be a Redneck Superhero If…
• You got your powers from radioactive chewing tobacco.
• Any part of your costume is made of flannel or denim.
• Your “secret weapon” against crime is a double-barreled, sawed-off shotgun.
• You use your X-Ray Vision to hunt possum.
• Your arch-nemesis is named “Mr. Toothless”.
• Your battle-cry is “Git ‘im!”.
• Your canine side-kick only has three legs.
• You list “High School Diploma” as one of your superpowers.
• Your “secret hideout” is a double-wide with camouflage netting.
• Your crime-fighting-mobile is currently up on blocks.
Be sure to “spot” me and Pam at the NASTC conference. We hope to see you in Tennessee later this week!
Happy Monday,
Mary
