Last week, I promised you a post about “I Want a Hippopotamus for Christmas.” I can’t for the life of me figure out why Gayla Peevey, who recorded the song at the age of ten in 1953, would ask for such a thing. I mean, what would you even do with a pet hippo? What would it eat? Where would you keep it?
The folks at Lite 98.7 asked similar questions and discovered that one measly hippopotamus will run you about $100,000. Not only that, you’ll also need a large water source ($150,000), 20 acres of land for roaming and exercise ($39,500), and 100 pounds of food a day ($18,250). The grand total? $307,750. Sorry, but I’d rather have the cash!
In fact, after listening to a few more holiday classics, I can’t help but wonder: why is everyone in these songs asking for things like their two front teeth, Christmas shoes, and hula-hoops? Whatever happened to sparkling jewelry, beach getaways, and Macy’s gift cards?
The mother of all unwanted gifts, however, is the “12 Days of Christmas.” Listen closely and you’ll realize that the singer’s “true love” must have put her at the top of the naughty list. Why else would he give her a partridge, geese, hens, and swans? Can you imagine cleaning up after all those critters? As if that isn’t bad enough, the true love also delivers 50 (yes, 50!) milking, drumming, piping, leaping, and dancing house guests. No thanks!
The craziest part of this song is that the singer’s beau could afford much better loot: her true love is loaded! According to the Pittsburgh PNC Wealth Management Group, in today’s prices, the total amount of all those birds and drummers and leaping lords would be a whopping $27,393 – up 7.7% from last year. And that doesn’t even take into account the cost of shipping!
The moral of the story? Be careful what you wish for, as Gayla Peevey discovered. After her song, “I Want a Hippopotamus for Christmas” became famous, a local promoter decided to make the little girl’s dream come true. He managed to raise enough money to present Gayla with a baby hippo named Mathilda on Christmas Eve, which she then donated to the city zoo. Talk about a re-gift!
As for me, this year, I’d like a fat bank account and a skinny body. I just hope Santa doesn’t get the two mixed up, like he did last year!!!
Happy Monday,
Mary
