Another Monday, and I’m pretty tired. I admit it – I’ve been channel-surfing late at night, and the next thing I know, I’m laughing at the infomercials. Maybe it’s that I sympathize with the people in those commercials who always seem to be having a really hard time. The simplest things always seem to kick their butts – whether it’s reaching for a bowl of cheese curls, or frying an egg.
Recently, I learned about a fun party game called simply, “Infomercial.” The game works like this: when someone shouts “infomercial!” at you, you must immediately and hilarious botch whatever task you’re up to. Pouring chips into a bowl? Drop the bag. Sweeping the floor? Suddenly, you can’t handle that crazy broom! Just like the folks in your favorite infomercials, the simplest household tasks are suddenly darn near impossible.
I think that’s how it always starts. I get a little sympathetic at the bad over-acting in the beginning. The next thing I know, I’m fascinated by the cheesy smiles of the over-enthusiastic hosts, encouraging me to “SET IT AND FORGET IT!” Shamwows, George Foreman Grills, Sticky Buddies…I can’t get enough. Even in the age of eBay and Amazon Prime, Americans spend an estimated $14 BILLION each year on products marketed via infomercials.
Even my son got addicted. He must have been up late (again!) and the repetition taught him the entire script. That’s another thing about infomercials; they play about a hundred times in a row. His product of choice? The Shower Wow, a gadget that affixes to the showerhead and plays a little light show. The result is a multicolored rave party of a shower that seems to brighten up the mornings of the kids in the infomercial. I learned all this after he came out of his room, hawking the product. “Mom, you know what need to buy? The Shower wow! It transforms water into a cascade of color!” He sounded just like the announcer.
I tried to talk him out of it, but Timothy was insistent. “Mom! They say if you’re one of the first 100 callers, it’s free and you just pay Shipping and Handling!” He doesn’t seem to realize that’s how they get you – charging more for shipping and handling than they do to make the piece of junk! Then again, I’ve been there myself, watching TV at 3AM…
Happy Monday,
Mary
