‘Selling’ often carries a negative connotation, conjuring up images of a fast-talking used car salesman or a pushy commissioned associate bent on ‘upgrading’ a sale with accessories and protection plans the buyer doesn’t really need. There’s an old joke that perpetuates this image:
Two salesmen, John and Fred, worked in a department store at the mall. They met at the local pub after work and started a bragging contest as to who was the best salesperson.
John said, “I’m such a great salesperson that last week I sold a color television to a blind man!”
He then added: “And today, I sold a hi-fi stereo system to a deaf man!”
Fred took his turn: “Today, I sold a cuckoo clock to your wife.”
John looked confused: “That’s all you got?”
But Fred continued: “Along with the cuckoo clock, I also sold her one hundred pounds of bird seed!”
This joke is based on the idea that selling is “trying to convince people to buy things they don’t need.” Who wants that? At Matchmaker, we subscribe to a different school of selling, and I credit my father for teaching me its most important lessons. Whereas most people think selling is about talking, it’s really about listening to customers and giving them what they need. In our line of work, it’s often attentive service and a solid relationship built on honesty and strong communication. Patricia Fripp said: “You don’t close a sale; you open a relationship if you want to build a long-term, successful enterprise.”
Speaking of relationships, here’s what happened to poor, misguided John:
Months later, John planned another night of drinking at the pub with Fred. He promised his wife he would be home by midnight. The hours passed quickly and the beer was going down way too easily. At 3am, drunk as a skunk, he headed home. As John let himself in the front door, the cuckoo clock in the hall started up and cuckoo-ed three times. Realizing his wife might wake up, John cuckoo-ed another 9 times, proud of himself for his quick thinking.
The next morning his wife asked John what time he had made it home. “Oh, right at 12 o’clock on the dot”, he replied, really ‘selling it’. She seemed satisfied, and John was pleased too. “Got away with that one!”, he thought. But a few minutes later, John’s wife announced that she would be buying a new cuckoo clock.
“What do you mean?”, asked John, “You just bought that one from Fred!” “Yes,” his wife answered, “But last night it cuckoo-ed 3 times, then said, ‘Oh crap!’; cuckoo-ed 4 more times, cleared its throat; cuckoo-ed another 3 times, giggled; cuckoo-ed twice more, and then, farted.”
Let ‘er rip this weekend,
~Bob
